Which is worse??? 👀

I’m curious how you gents will vote

Those aren't reasonable choices, because nobody would ever willingly go for either, or return again.

I didn’t say “would you stay/return to” or even ”in this industry” (despite having encountered both circumstances within the industry myself). I said “which is worse?” and left the context open. You limited yourself there. Good to know you find both unbearable though. 👍🏻

B. A great personality can overcome a lot of sins.

It depends what you’re there for. My opinion: Foreplay can improve with feedback, personality; not so much. I like to have some connection though. Others prefer minimal personal interaction so I imagine their opinions are the opposite.

A personality I can’t stand is a real boner killer. “Not my cup of tea” or “a little odd” I can get past in someone, but “can’t stand” are strong words and are definitely a big negative no matter what a woman looks like or does/

Really stumped on this one. I can't really see a realistic scenario with the second option. If I can't stand the person, I'm not going to enjoy the foreplay as my brain will be trying to figure out an exit strategy. I guess that would be my choice then. If I really liked someone, I could easily stand some subpar foreplay.

I choose "A personality you are ignited by but foreplay is subpar" as unbearable, since I've never been in a relationship where I was with someone with a great personality, only to experience subpar foreplay. I don't have a frame of reference to gauge how unbearable that would be. The alternative answer is something I've actually experienced. "A personality you can’t stand but foreplay is phenomenal", as it was a ONS/FWB situation with a girl who had that big-sister immaturity with a dash of "pick me" vibe happening.... We were both sharing the same circle of friends at the time, but she had a thing for me, but I wasn't aware because how she expressed her interest was more about teasing and mild-bullying instead of being more open about her desires, but she'd just always linger around me regardless of all the friendly ball-breaking she did....I never pursued a relationship with her because I found her that annoying... until one summer our circle of friends took a weeklong camping trip, where she shed the big-sister bully 'act', and threw herself at me. We did wind up having sex a few times, late at night as she always snuck into my tent or went hiking away from the group. It was great and exciting.. and no one suspected at thing, since they all saw how her annoyances often pissed me off that it was a far fetched idea that we were fuck-buddies through-out that whole trip... once the camping trip was over, we all went our separate ways.... we never pursued a real relationship after because we knew our personalities would get in the way....

I can tolerate anything that comes from a genuine personality. One time I almost didn't have any sex from an SP, maybe she was very close to her period but she tried her best to make it up for me and that's what matters to me most. She gave a good massage and took a shower with me and jerked me off there. We also had a nice chat. I literally wanted to take her out for a date, she was so genuine and kind. However the sex was one of the worst, but that doesn’t matter. Tbh, I pay money to have a good time, good sex is just part of that.

You perceive a great personality - but the foreplay is so so. So communicate, after all you are good with what you see, hear and feel.

For me, chemistry is part of foreplay. I get turned on by someone whose personality I mesh well with!

blakealridge said: For me, chemistry is part of foreplay. I get turned on by someone whose personality I mesh well with! Click to expand... You will not have chemistry with the ugliest man ever... Our society is wired for beauty. The original poster ask a question that is mental vs physical in nature. So how do they match or compare?

Personality. Over the years I've seen some ladies who would be considered perhaps average in appearance, but their approach to the session and sometimes outright raw lust (faked or real) MORE than made the experience memorable and repeatable. I've also seen some ladies who were without a doubt model material, but they were so separated from the experience I may as well have been watching porn in my living room.

80watts said: You will not have chemistry with the ugliest man ever... Our society is wired for beauty. The original poster ask a question that is mental vs physical in nature. So how do they match or compare? Click to expand... I do. I’ve had chemistry with men who would be considered hideous who I get along with, and I’ve felt repulsed by conventionally gorgeous men I don’t feel a connection with. I can appreciate beauty like a painting done with skill, but sometimes I feel nothing when I look at it while a splatter of paint will resonate. I don’t see the difference, personally. For me connection is attraction.

blakealridge said: I do. I’ve had chemistry with men who would be considered hideous who I get along with, and I’ve felt repulsed by conventionally gorgeous men I don’t feel a connection with. I can appreciate beauty like a painting done with skill, but sometimes I feel nothing when I look at it while a splatter of paint will resonate. I don’t see the difference, personally. For me connection is attraction. Click to expand... I just can't believe that you are some type of saint.... Every body has standards/prejudices; you can't be human without them.

Personality is everything. For me that's the best foreplay there can be. Personality is the cake and sex is the icing.

80watts said: You will not have chemistry with the ugliest man ever... Our society is wired for beauty. The original poster ask a question that is mental vs physical in nature. So how do they match or compare? Click to expand... 80watts said: I just can't believe that you are some type of saint.... Every body has standards/prejudices; you can't be human without them. Click to expand... @80watts A) Please stop speaking for women on how chemistry is fostered for them. We have multiple generations responding in these threads, as well as differing levels of self-awareness and societal influence in upbringing (hence me “wondering how the gents will vote”). Blake has touched on some nuance here, and did not regard herself as a saint at all. It’s obvious, however, that you view finding someone others view as conventionally unattractive as a saint-like quality. Her standards are just simply less based on physical appearance (as are mine). I find a man telling me what I will enjoy (an ego-based personality trait) absolutely insufferable - regardless of his physical appearance. B) You are correct on society being hard-wired for attraction (particularly symmetry). Babies even have this and will stare at people they find beautiful (one of the reasons I don’t crucify men for having eyes - so long as they have the awareness not to stare greater than three Mississippi’s like a baby will). C) Something I purposefully left out to see if it would be brought up organically: Attraction to personality is separate from someone’s ability to read another’s body language or follow direction given about likes and dislikes. With that said, some people have never practiced the art of giving direction or demonstrating what they like. This is a two-way street. I appreciate how many times men brought up communication. Quite endearing! D) The original poster was referring to personality versus physical skill in foreplay. I mentioned nothing about physical appearance or attractiveness. @blakealridge Appreciate your input love! I share the sentiments you stated. ☺♥

80watts said: I just can't believe that you are some type of saint.... Every body has standards/prejudices; you can't be human without them. Click to expand... I think if you read this again with a different mindset, you might find she has told you what her bias is. Connection.

80watts said: I just can't believe that you are some type of saint.... Every body has standards/prejudices; you can't be human without them. Click to expand... I do have standards, they’re just not related to physicality. It’s okay if you don’t believe me!

I'm not sure how a negative personality can have great foreplay, it just seems counter-intuitive. I guess straight jerks can also fuck well but foreplay is about building mutual investment and engagement on the way to fucking, so I can't imagine I would be into that with someone I dislike personality-wise (also, on the flip-side, I can't see someone with a shitty personality caring enough about someone else to really get into foreplay well).