"Nana" - Yifeng Massage (Kingsway @ Windsor, 3 blocks East of Fraser)

A terrible experience with a person who has no business offering these services. Avoid at all costs. The person, and the shop. I'm done. This is their leolist ad. I don't know who any of these people are... but they sure as Hell weren't available when I went there. Don't hold your breath. https://www.leolist.cc/personals/fe..._girls_japanese_girls_filipino_girls-10987671 Phone: 604-562-8454 Date of Visit: March 2026 Location: Yifeng Massage. A street-front shop on the North side of Kingsway at Windsor St., which is three blocks East of Fraser. Type of Service: Asian Massage Parlor. It appears to be one hallway going back with 4 (maybe 5) rooms all on the left (as in the hallway pictures in the ads). Each room has a shower. 2-3 ladies on shift. Open 10:00AM to 2:00AM. Looks: "Nana" is Chinese. Originally from Central China... appears to be recruited out of Guangzhou... like basically everyone else. She is about 40-45 years old. Average Chinese 'T&T Mom" face... somewhat overly made up. Long hair. Overweight. Out of shape. Pear shaped. Minimal-to-no ass. Her waist is practically wider than her ass. Probably around 5'6" and 140 pounds. Natural C-cup type boobs on a wide, soft, body. Typical Chinese large "pencil eraser" nipples with small areola. Pale skin. Soft and smooth. Big hairy "Mom pussy." Full bush. Outie lips. Not tight... but yet somehow still can't hardly "take it" in most positions... particularly doggie. Rates: It is $220 for 1hr. FS. With a +$50 tip for a terrible BBBJ where she fucking put alcohol based mouthwash in her mouth and then put her mouth on my dick, I didn't realize what she had done until I started to feel the burn. I paid $220 + $50 = $270 Total. Extras: Who fucking cares at this point? Never see this woman. Never. However, if you really want to know, I would surmise that her service is: No kissing of any kind; no DATY; no DATO; no digits; no pussy slide; no CIM; no RIM; no COF; no anal, etc. And only if you have lost your goddamn mind would you allow her to do a BBBJ on you after reading this review. Services provided: Relatively hard massage with oil; touching/kissing/sucking on boobs; touching outside of her pussy; Alcohol mouthwash BBBJ; Covered FS to completion; massage afterward... during which I had to tell her to stop pressing so hard (I think with her elbow) on pressure points. Ugghh... don't go guys. Stay away. Verdict: Hell No! She needs to find other ways to make a living. Gone. "Bye!" Backstory: I was having kind of a shit pooning experience today... and it just got progressively worse. The Poon Gods were against me for some reason. I was finishing up a really challenging work-cycle (over the last couple of weeks) this afternoon... and wanted to treat myself. I should have just stayed home. I put the first part of my misery in this thread in 411. I tried to go to this new Skylight Spa in Burnaby... no go... and then I bailed on New Star after... a fairly minor... but I felt they were not being straight with me on timing... and that is a "no go" for me. https://www.leolist.cc/personals/fe..._girls_japanese_girls_filipino_girls-10987671 Yifeng... third (and last) time there: So... it is 10:00PM... and I still feel like I want to have this experience today... so I decide to head over to Yifeng... as I knew it was open late. I get there... the normal Mamasan is not there... it is young Bro-san. He looks like a Chinese SFU student in a hoodie... wearing a toque. The kind of kid you see in a coffee shop at 11:00PM with headphones and a laptop... pretending to study for exams. He whisks me into Room 1 this time. This room sucks. It is half the size of Room 2 ("Bobo" and "Monica" reviews) or Room 3 (where I ended up this time) but, whatever. I've been in smaller and... believe it or not... I am not a complainer. I have lots of patience. Even I have my limits though. Bro-san asks how long I want to stay. I say one hour. He says he will get the girls to come and say "hi." First lady. Short and fat White girl with blonde hair. Big pale white boobs hanging half-out of her top... but totally out of shape, and not overly attractive. I think she used the name "Bella." Next lady... see above description... out of shape 45 year old Chinese "T&T Mom." Average looking at best. "Nana." Bro-san comes back: "Which one do you want." So guys... if you are looking at their leolist ads..... HAHAHA!! The joke is on you (and me)... apparently. I should have walked out right then and there, but I have this bad habit of trying to make the best out of bad situations, and make things work. That is going to start changing in the AMPs for me after tonight. For starters... I am going to ask women in the line-up... "Do you kiss?" If it is a "no" or no answer given... "bye." You're done. "Next." You are in the wrong business. I am also going to start asking about services generally, to the ladies themselves, or to the Mama/Papa/Bro-sans.... as awkward as that all is... as I am done with out of shape middle aged women that don't provide a fraction of the level of service available at more reputable places. I tell Bro-san "Nana," and he says she will be there in 3 minutes, and I can take a shower if I want. I give him the $220. I strip off and get in the corner-unit type shower that is crammed into that little room. Between the shower and the bed, they take up most of the floor space. In comes "Nana" when I am still in the shower. She wants to dry me off with a towel as I am coming out of the shower, then I tie the towel around my waist and lay down face first. She asks if I want to listen to music, which she plays on her phone.... selects a song.... plays it WAY too loud (as loud as a Chinese smart phone will go) ... then selects another song, and repeats this process several more times. 'Is this okay?" she asks... I tell her, "It is fine. Just not so loud." And she has the phone right beside my head, and she strips down to nothing, gets on top of me and starts massaging my back. I try to grab the phone and reduce the volume, and I tell her what I am doing, but she takes it and apologizes and puts it over on the shelf in the corner. After a few minutes I flip over, and then I sit up. At this point I realized... Oh my God... she is a fucking "head turner" as well... [:(][:(][:mad:] ... as an out-of-shape 45 year old "T&T Mom." You have got to be fucking kidding me. I am asking from now on. "No kiss?" I say. "No" she confirms. I am caressing her body, both of us sitting facing toward each other... I touch her boobs and the top of her pussy. I want to talk to her about extras. She wants to use translation on her phone. "Will you suck me no condom?" ... She looks at the phone... "Oh... BBBJ. Yes. Okay. It is extra charge." ... Yah. No shit. That is what we are discussing here.... I say, "Okay, $50?" since that I was I gave "Bobo" for BBBJ at this place. Her face lights up, "Sure!" I should have just gone for straight FS... if I knew what was coming. I tell her again... can you turn that music down. But then she tells me this room is no good... mouthing something silently and pointing through the wall in the direction of the front counter (this Room 1 is directly behind the front counter through a thin wall). And I am thinking, "What? Bro-san gives a shit about what we are doing here?" I don't quite get her point, but then she is standing up and saying we can go to Room 2. She ties a towel around her self and asks me to do the same. She picks up my shoes... and carries them... and her handbag and goes out into the hallway... as I grab my clothes and follow her. She tries to go into Room 2. It is locked. Bro-san comes into the hallway and is talking to her in Chinese. I can tell that he is saying 'Try Room 3." She does. Also locked. A much better looking Chinese lady pops her head out from behind the curtain at the end of the hall..... where was SHE for my line-up.... and joins the conversation in Chinese. We are standing in the hallway wearing just white towels... as the crowd grows larger... I tilt my head back... and say out loud, "Oh, for fuck's sake!" and walk back into Room 1. They (Bro-san and "Nana") know they are losing me now... and they start apologizing. "Nana" does get the door open to Room 3 and calls me in there.... saying, "Are you o.k.? I want you be happy." Punk rock "Diana" is in the room, stripping off the sheets and cleaning up the towels from her guest. She looks WAY better than I remember... and way better than the two out-of-shape ladies in my "line-up." Her back and arms are toned, and she looks great. I am not crazy about her voice, but I consider asking if I can switch. I think that is a bridge too far at this point. Anyway... I am not really going to go total "blow-by-blow" with the rest of this like I normally would. Suffice it to say.... "Nana" gets me to lay on my back on the bed. The she pulls out a travel-sized bottle of mouthwash and swigs that... and I thought she was just doing that to freshen up her breath... but no.... I can feel my dick burning in her mouth... she left it in her mouth! Some bullshit germaphobe thing to satisfy her fears over oral sex... I guess. I wish she would have just told me, "No BBBJ. Cover only," and not have her face light up at the prospect of getting a $50 tip, and then do this to me. She is in the wrong line of work and should quit immediately, or be fired. No question. This is not the job for her. She pulls her mouth off... I am starting to realize that this is potentially a real problem, as that shit is going to mess with the PH balance of the skin on my dick... I think. She goes to take another swig of it... and I tell her, "No. That stuff burns." ... "Oh okay. Sorry. I use water then." The water I think actually helped things a bit but... fuck.... I am really struggling to make the best of some bad situations in some of these TOFTT scenarios. She does suck my dick like that for awhile... but... to say this is a "mood killer" .... uhh... yah. She now has her condom package out and has her pussy all lubed up. She gets on top of me and rides me cowgirl... keeping her head far enough away from me so I... I don't know... don't mess up her make up? I can suck on her boobs from this position though. I am performing fine... considering. Heat of the moment, I guess, and I am in pretty decent shape... so stuff works. I do get her to "come down" and get her legs back and straight, in between mine (what I call "The Miya" in my reviews after the legendary Metrotown area provider), and she is good with this at first... as I pull her down toward me... but then she is showing signs of discomfort. She wants to switch positions and gets on her back. I get on top of her in missionary, and she is pretty good with this at first. Then I straighten my legs out and brace my feet against the wall in a kind of "push up" position, and start to pound down on her a bit... nope. That is too much. I get up and turn her so that I am standing... and she is in a kind of missionary on her back at the edge of the bed. She is okay with this and takes it pretty well... but then starts asking me to cum. And it is like... WTF? we just started. I ain't no "one minute man." (In fairness, we are probably 5-8 minutes in at this point, but with my "All-star ladies" - "Miya," "Sandy," "Sweet," "Sugar." "Eva," etc. we would indeed "just be starting.") I get her to turn onto her side (fetal position) with me standing. She is good with this, and I rub her clit with my thumb, and she seems to be enjoying it... but then says, "No." This won't work for her either... I guess. I break off and tell her I want to go to doggie. She gets on her knees, and I have to tap her shoulders... to get her to go down... you need to get your butt "up" in this position. I enter her from behind, "Ahh no, no, no... too big." ... Oh, for fuck's sake... I go really slow. She seems to be doing o.k. I get up on my feet, "Ohh... no... no... no... too big." I try to get her to drop down on her tummy.... "Oh... no... no." She wants me to sit back and she will get on top of me again. My head is resting against the mirror on the wall and she asks if this is o.k., but it is fine. She rides me cowgirl again, and I figure I better just cum like this before this falls apart anymore... so I do. She asks offers to massage me again, and we do that. This is where she was going way too hard on pressure points with her elbow, and I had to tell her to stop (and usually I try to "roll with it" in these situations). She is terrible at sex, and terrible at massage. Well... she was o.k. in the other room, with some good pressure, but now it was either too soft.... just rubbing oil... or painful. We talk a bit more about her personal situation and stuff like that. I won't repeat any of it. It doesn't matter. She is asking me how old I am; am I married; do I have kids; telling me how she would really like to be able to stay in Canada.... Chinese women are hardworking and responsible.... and I am just thinking, "I am so fucking done with this conversation. Why don't you learn how to do this job before trying to play 'the boyfriend game" with me." But I don't say a word of that to her. Her alarm on her phone goes off and she indicates that we are at "time." She says I can get in the shower if I want... the implication being... with the delays she caused, I can go over time a bit. She gets in the shower after me, as I am getting dressed. She can tell I am not really happy, and is trying to mitigate, asking me if I am "O.k." and 'happy." I put $50 on the bed and attempt to open the door without contacting her further, but she wants to come and hug me before I go. She has a look in her eyes like..."Fuck. How do I fix this." I walk out. Bro-san is out front. He asks if I would like water or a coke. "No. I am good." I ask him about "Bobo" and "Monica." "Bobo" is in China for a couple of weeks and will be back. "Monica" is off until at least April and (in my view) it sounds like she is like done. See my posts on this in the respective "Bobo" and "Monica" threads. He asks me how everything was. I tell him, "Honestly... terrible." and give the "thumbs down" sign. "She should find a different job. She is not suited to this kind of work. Terrible experience." I mean what can he really say to that? ... so he just gives me a diplomatic non-response... and I walk out. Never to return. Recommend? What the fuck do you think? I had to go home and get some skin cream on my dick right away. Yes, it did look abnormally red... I think I should be o.k. in a day or so. I just have to reestablish the moisture of the skin and give it a break. Where the fuck do they get these people? Where is the training? The expectations being made clear... the industry standards... what to do... and how to do it. Basic health and safety training and information for the provider... and how to protect the client. If you don't want to do BBBJ... without burning the guy's dick... then don't fucking offer it! Really simple. Putting fucking alcohol mouthwash in your mouth and sucking someone's dick... based... presumably... on some unrealistic bizarre conception of risk mitigation... is totally nuts!! No health professional would ever condone that. AVOID! AVOID! AVOID at all costs! Good riddance! The sooner the better! "Bye!"

Oh man … sorry to hear that. Lighting $270 on fire is the worst. If it’s any consolation, we’ve all had our Nana’s. But a mouthwash BJ cleanse? That’s a new one 🤣 At least you have a tale to tell your Perb bros 😭 May your next one be a 10. 🤞🏼

Cutthroat exp

I tried twice to check the 'new' ownership at Skylight in Burnaby... what a waste of time. They are new owners, but keep posting add with 20 year old girls and have 50+ aunties offering " very good massage" ... avoid yourself the pain.

Goddamn, this is the 1st time I've seen Andmac makes a negative review. You know it's going to be sh*tshow if that happens. Thank you for writing this review, this has now kill any interest I have left at trying this place.

iori-yagami said: Goddamn, this is the 1st time I've seen Andmac makes a negative review. You know it's going to be sh*tshow if that happens. Thank you for writing this review, this has now kill any interest I have left at trying this place. Click to expand... Yah... I try to be positive. I also try to be one of these... "enjoy it for what it is" people... whether it is a handjob place, no kissing, CBJ only, or whatever.... sometimes that is not possible. This was horrific. This was injury. Not intentional, but injury all the same. I have had a lot of glowing reviews... I realize that... "Sandy," "Sweet," "Sugar," "Emma"/"Gina," "Eva," "Danina," Metrotown "Miya"/"Candy"...."Bobo" at Yifeng, "Lisa" from Face2Feet were all very positive..... those ladies are stars. Some more than others. "Sandy," "Sweet," "Eva," "Danina," and "Miya"/"Candy" are on my "All-time List." The reviews for "April" and "Miya" at New Star Highlighted some problems... as did "Dora" at Face2Feet and "Monica" at Yifeng. "Selena"/"Celina" at New Star was good BBBJ and sex... but bad attitude, humiliating at times and way overcharged. I highlighted all that. This situation... with the mouthwash blowjob... this was a nightmare. I still feel angry about it. My dick did seem to recover quite well... thankfully. I am back to basically normal within about 48hrs. ... but I did have to repeatedly use some skin cream to get things to look right. Such a violation. Fuck! And I would have been okay with CBJ... obviously.... if that is what she was offering. I literally did that with the previous lady at this place, "Monica." I definitely did NOT consent to this... being injured in that way... no matter how "no big deal" anyone thinks it might be. It was not her intention to injury me.. it is just... GET THE FUCK OUT OF THIS BUSINESS if you are not comfortable sucking on dicks! Or tell the guy CBJ only!!! Fuck! This is "Nana" by the way. This is definitely not advertising... this is a warning.

OMeffingG! This is absolute GOLD!! (not relishing your pain, just reliving some of my own). My fav is 'hand-job, now' after 2 minutes of attempted penetration 😔 As you most accurately stated, some are just not cut-out for this type of work. We do this for any length of time and the odds finally catch-up...thanks for memorializing